Saturday, August 30, 2014

Fine line between being an inspiration and being an a**

When I was growing up there was a foster home very close to where I lived.  If you remember I grew up in the middle of nowhere, eastern WA.  But there was a "town" about 3 miles away called Cunningham, this "town" had only about 5 people living in it, and when I was in Jr. High, a foster home moved to this town.  They bought or rented 4 separated houses and took over the "town."  Many of my friends from high school and a couple of my boyfriends (3)(I was a sucker for "bad boys") came from this foster home (which was more like a group home than a foster home). 
That little cluster of buildings is Cunningham.  My parents'
house is on the horizon, which you can't see here.
I was pretty close to several girls there, and heard some very, very bad things about how they did things at this foster home.  This foster home was the reason I went into social work as a brand new college student.  I was going to (single handedly) change the foster care system and make it better. 

Recently someone that lived there for a short period of time, that I was friends with (and Chris dated for about half a minute) contacted me on Facebook.  I friended her and we've talked a little recently.  Anyway, the other day she told me she wanted to lose weight and thought that running was the way for her to do it.  She asked me for any advise I could give her and told me that I was her "coach."  This is not the first time someone has asked for my advice, and I don't really know what to say to people who ask. I wrote her a long facebook msg:

I can tell you what I did, but ultimately, you have to do your own thing, Everyone is different.
I "only" had 40-50 lbs to lose and it took me 2 years to lose 30 of those lbs. I tell you that, because losing weight is a long term process. Granted, people with more weight than me to lose, can lose faster than me. Also, I started running because I have always liked it. I enjoyed it in grade school and would run a little at times as an adult, but never kept with it long.
Two years ago I was on Pinterest and there was a lot of fitness stuff, and I started to feel like I wanted to start running again. One of the pins I saw was a link to a blog "Runs for Cookies" ( and I started reading that one and several other running blogs which really kept me motivated to run every day. I was so scared that if I didn't go running for one day, one day would turn to two, two to three, three to a week, and on. I had to force my self to take one day off because it's good for your body to heal. I also made sure that I continued looking at the things on Pinterest and the blogs I read to keep me motivated. And on days I REALLY didn't want to go, I (still) just put on my running clothes and shoes and then it makes me feel like I have to go.
I went into it with the thought that I love to run, and if I lost weight at the same time, cool, but if not, at least I'm getting into shape. Once I started running and losing a little weight I decided to change up my eating. I bought a food scale and started really measuring out my portions. I didn't change what I ate at first, just ate less of it. Only one true serving (that was measured out) instead of what I "thought" was serving (or two or three).
I would lose some weight and then plateau out. If I wanted to lose more, I had to change up my eating some more. I started looking for healthier recipes and eating less snacks and other "bad" stuff. And then I'd plateau again and I'd have to change something up again.
So, what am I getting at here? I'm saying that it takes time. You have to start with small changes. And you have to find something that will keep you motivated. You also have to remember that you have to do what you like. I like running, and I think there are tons of benefits to it, but some people hate it. If you hate the exercise you decide to do, you most likely won't stick with it very long.
I also feel like you have to change your eating slowly. At first, just eat less of what you are currently eating. And change it up when you're ready or when you notice you're not losing more weight. Read up on different ways to eat, and don't think of it as a diet, but as a permanent way of eating. If it's permanent, then you also have to make sure what you eat and how much you eat is something you enjoy. If you lose weight and then go back to eating the same things you did before you lost weight, then you will gain it back. I've heard that maintenance is a lot harder than losing weight.
Right now I've been on a plateau for 2 months, but I'm not sure I want to change my eating more, so I'm happy to stay where I'm at for now, and maybe in the future I'll lose some more weight, or not. I'm okay with that. I tend to lose a large amount in about a month and then plateau for a long time (2 months isn't nearly as long as my last plateaus).
You also have to be okay with putting yourself first. There have been times when Chris has gotten mad at me because I would come home for work and immediately go for a run. But this is for my health, and my well-being, I'm going to be selfish sometimes. I also have had times when I won't eat what he made for dinner, I make my chicken breast and he gets mad at that too. But I have told him that I'm not hurting anyone by not eating his food, and didn't ask him to make me something special.
Also, log your food. I have used a couple different apps/websites for it. The first one I used was and the one I currently use is I also use while I run (on my phone) to track my mileage.
Well, that's a lot more than you probably asked for. Let me know if there's anything else I can do to help.

Anyway, I heard back from her that day, but nothing since.  I just don't know if I should say anything to her or not.  I am so uncomfortable "pushing" my stuff on others, I don't want to sound superior or cocky.  The girl that asked me over a year and a half ago for advice pretty much quit talking to me except when I go to the dentist. 

11 miles ran so far this week, and even though I was planning 5 miles today, I don't know if I'll have the opportunity.  Damian has a football scrimmage so I don't know if I'll be able to get out of the house for a run.

Oh and that whole plantar faciitis thing?  Well, I tend to get lazy with rolling and icing when my feet feel better and I hadn't rolled them consistently for almost a week.  Yesterday my feet hurt, so I rolled them, 10 min each and wow, what a difference it makes.  *Note to self: roll your feet every day whether they hurt or not. 

1 comment:

  1. Your not's just that people think it sounds great until they realize the work they have to put into it!!!!!