Growing old sucks

 Last week while I was watching the TV I noticed that an area on my jaw was hurting.  It felt like pain I've had from infections from teeth, and I know I have a problem tooth in that area so I called the dentist.  He put me on an antibiotic and I've been taking it since Friday.  Unfortunately, I still have a sore spot on my jaw and that has me worried that maybe it isn't dental, but I do have a dentist appt this coming Friday, so we'll see.  

Why am I telling you this story? Because I'm pretty sure the antibiotic has caused some bloating, which means weight gain.  If you look at my page for countdown, this week I was back up to 173, which is higher than I have been on my weigh ins since my first one, although, I guess not a ton higher.  But it's frustrating.  I was actually up to 174 on Monday but we went out to eat on Sunday, so that definitely affected it.  I have been very good this week, so not seeing the number drop (yesterday I was the same as Tuesday) is frustrating.  Even just a little.  

Another thing about these pills . . . I decided to start intermittent fasting again. Of course I decided right about the same time as I started taking the antibiotic.  Well, the first day I took them I was so nauseous I was gagging, coughing.  Then I remembered the pharmacist saying to eat with food because they're very harsh on the stomach.  Well, I'm supposed to take them 4 times a day, which means first thing in the morning and last thing at night.  So much for intermittent fasting. . . 

This pills are awful, even though I eat something every time I take one, by the time I've taken the 3rd pill my stomach is rolling.  They also leave a metallic taste in my mouth.  Next time I ask/need antibiotics, I will definitely request not these.  

I guess it's just frustrating.  I was frustrated, but was able to talk myself into believing it was okay because I was below where I "should" be, but not this week.  

Anyway, I hope you all are doing better than me.

Get out of your head

 I'll admit, my first week went better than my second week.  I have noticed I can do pretty good for a week, but then it starts to crumble and I give up.  So this is me, forcing myself to not give up.  Last spring when I was doing intermittent fasting I was also logging my food and weekly weight.  I didn't feel like I was being successful at the time, plus Maddox's sports being so late, so I stopped. I had quit using Myfitnesspal because it changed and I didn't like it as much, so I was logging my weight in a notebook without calories attached.  This time around, I've gone back to Myfitnesspal, and it really is unrecognizable, but it's not as awful as I thought.

It's been freezing cold here, and that is literally.  Western WA doesn't often see freezing temperatures but this week it hasn't been above 32degrees since Thursday.  Well, that definitely stopped me from running.  I know that I've run in freezing temperatures before, but I just didn't want to, and I guess I haven't completely solved my lack of motivation (see previous post) issue.  Yesterday was supposed to be the coldest day but it was sunny.  I gazed outside and decided I did not want to freeze my bum off, so I told myself I'd run today.  Instead, I read an entire book.  It also doesn't help that my sister went out of town for the weekend with her husband so we didn't do yoga pilates (I gotta quit calling it yoga, it is definitely more pilates than yoga) yesterday, and my morning schedule last week was crazy, so we only did it 2 times during the week.

Well, this morning, I was well on my way to finishing another book in a day, but I finally decided to get off my a....butt and go for a walk/run.  While I was run/walking I was thinking about how frustrated I am about letting myself gain 25 lbs (10-15lbs in just the last 6 months) and also that it doesn't just melt off after I've been good for a week or two.  I've been weighing myself daily, and writing it down, and I've been discouraged because the last 4 days I've fluctuated in the low 170s.  I was feeling that same amount of discouragement I felt last spring.  When I got back I was looking at my old food logs, and while I wasn't losing quickly, it was a steady decline.  In March I weighed in at 162, and my last weight recorded at that time was 159 in May.  Only 3 lbs, but still 3 lbs in a little over 2 months.

I did create a new page on here, called Countdown to August 2024.  I thought it'd be fun to have my weekly goal weight on the page and I'd cross it off as I got to it.  As I was calculated the 0.5lbs I was supposed to lose weekly, I got to August and realized that 1/2 a pound a week wasn't enough to get to where I want to be.  I increased it to 0.75 a week, and that was still not good enough.  I didn't want to go to a pound a week because I didn't think that was realistic, so after more calculations, 0.81 lbs a week is where I need to be to be 150 by August.  

Well, the first week it dropped quickly, and I was happy, but remember that just before weighing myself on 1/2 I had been in e. WA with family eating junk, and was likely carrying a lot of water weight.  I went from 175 to 172.4 in a week, 3 1/2 lbs is amazing in one week, but now I'm freaking out, because I'm fluctuating in my daily weigh-ins.  Friday I was 173, yesterday I was 171.2, and today I was 172 . . . granted, according to my calculations, next Tuesday I'm supposed to be at 173.38, but I definitely don't want to see the number go up in a week.  Although, maybe I should look at it as an experiment in food and drink for this second week to see what I need to tweak.  But it is very discouraging.  My brain automatically goes to, what if I can't get lower than 170?  I seem to always get stuck at these numbers, and in my head I was stuck at the 160 mark in the spring.  

Maybe it's the daily weigh-ins?  But I also like the accountability of the daily weigh-ins.  When I was doing this 10 years ago, I weighed daily, but I could make myself only look at the end of the week number.  I'm struggling with that this time.  

I need to keep reminding myself the slow numbers are okay, and to look at the trend, not the daily fluctuations.  And also, my January 30th goal weight is 171.76.  I've already had two days lower than that at 171.2 both times.  

So yeah, this is my "get out of your head" post.  Just eat well, and exercise. 

I got a small "walking pad" for Christmas

that I put in my office at work. 

a post of TMI

 Hello!  Two months since I last posted.  Not surprisingly I've been very inconsistent with diet and exercise.  The only thing I did stick with was pilates/yoga with my sister, and literally it's because of my sister.  Accountability partners are really good, I just wish I had something better for my diet and running.  Anyone else notice that when people stop posting, it's usually because they've usually stopped trying?  I vowed I wouldn't do that, and yet I did.  

This post might be all over the place, so I apologize. 

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.  😉

Maybe I'll do a recap of my holidays later, but it's doubtful.  I also typically do a recap of my year, which I started in the middle of December, but didn't finish.  I do like having that recap because it shows what I've done, or in the case of 2023, what I didn't do.  But tonight I have a few other things on my mind I want to talk about.

I am going through menopause, maybe perimenopause, I don't know if there's a difference in how your body is, but I have many, many symptoms of the dreaded menopause, and have had for a few years.  It started with night sweats 3 or 4 years ago, but this last year it's gotten a lot worse. 

• I've lost hair
• my sex drive has gone way down
• even during sex, it's pretty dry down there,
• I've gained weight with no change to my diet
• insomnia (although that has been off and on for most of my life, but much worse lately)
• I haven't had my period in forever
• very irritable
• fatigue, but unable to go to sleep
• dry skin

And at least one thing I didn't know was a symptom of menopause

•  lack of motivation.  

My sister found a book a while ago on Kindle that, at the time, was free, so I downloaded it.  "Menopause: Let's get to point, period" The name is ridiculously long, so I'm not going to type it all out.  It's a fairly short book and is an easy read (Oh, and if you have Kindle Unlimited, it's still free to borrow.)  Anyway, I found out from reading that book that loss of motivation is a symptom of menopause, and that has bothered me.

I have wondered most of 2023 why I'm just not motivated.  Why can't I just go for a run?  Why is it so hard for me to follow through with anything?  Running is my thing.  I am a runner.  But am I because I don't run?  I just don't want to do anything.  I don't want to eat well, I don't want to exercise. I just want to stay in bed all the time.  It has bothered me, but not enough to actually do something. 

I went to Hawaii in July and August and I hated how I felt there.  I felt fat and ugly and just gross.  I didn't even want to run and that trail is my #1 top running location.  I love that trail.  Did I go for a run? Yes, just once though.  I came home and had a little motivation to lose weight, but it didn't last.  I have continued to feel fat and useless and have continued to gain weight.  

I am a big supplement fan.  I take quite a few (my sister calls me Grandma Curl - mom's mom - because she was well known for her mass amounts of supplements).  Anyway, I started taking collagen, krill oil, a liver support pill, calcium, tumeric, Vitamin D, Vitamin C, glucosamine chondroitin, magnesium, and a multivitamin.  There are a couple supplements I've found that combines some of these, like Provitalize, and I also take Nutrafol, which is supposed to help with hair loss.  

So what does this have to do with menopause? Well, a few of these (collagen, magnesium, provitalize, and nutrafol) are supposed to be good for menopausal symptoms.  

This last fall I was googling something about menopause and saw that Red Clover is a supplement that is well-known in traditional medicine for it's benefits, especially for menopause (it can also help to lower high blood pressure, and cholesterol).  But one of the things I saw was that it's good for motivation (of course, I can't find that article now, but I saw it, I know I did), so I started taking it.

I noticed a difference at 2 weeks. So much so that I shared it with my sisters (2 older and one 3 yrs younger than me).  It's been a gradual increase in my motivation, but I can definitely feel it.  No, this is not a commercial, it's just something I've been thinking about.  It feels good to want to go for a run again.  It's nice to feel like I can take control of my eating and drinking.  

And this is where I go to a different topic, but I'll try to bring it back around to this🠉.

When my Dad died, my sisters and I decided to go to Disneyland with some of his money.  We were going to set some aside in the estate account for us to go and had decided to go Spring Break of 2024.  New Year's Eve weekend we did our family Christmas celebration and we started to talk about going to Disneyland.  One of my sisters decided she wouldn't go to Disneyland (she didn't say why, but I believe it's a political reason 🙄) so we were brainstorming other places to go.  Someone mentioned another cruise, and then my sister Nancy suggested a cruise to Mexico.  In looking for a cruise, we discovered that cruises are sold out for the first week of April (our spring break), so we were looking at other dates.  We found a 4 day cruise in August to Catalina and Ensenada, so we decided to try to go on that.  My immediate family is going to go to Disneyland right after because my kids have been excited about it, and Asher will be almost 5, which will be a great age for him.  

Anyway, in thinking about going on a cruise to Mexico in August, I realized I'm going to feel awful, again, in a tropical area in my bathing suit again like I did last August in Hawaii.  So what does that mean?  I need to be motivated and focused to lose some weight.  It means cracking down on exercising, eating well, and not drinking so much wine.   

We came home from our family Christmas on the 1st and all the way home I was pep talking myself into what I needed to do.  On these trips we also have a lot of junk food.  My Mom used to make a chex mix she called Scrabble, and it's high in sodium, plus cheesecake I make, cookies, and just general Christmas junk food.  So driving home, I'm thinking, "I need to know what I weigh.  I need to weigh myself tomorrow.  Yes, it will likely be higher than it would have been without this trip, but I need to just do it."  So Tuesday morning I got up and weighed myself for the first time in several months, only to discover I was just 2 lbs lower than I was at my starting weight in 2012. In 2012 I was 177, on the 2nd I was 175. 

How frustrating. It took me 3 years to lose it before and I was younger.  Now I'm asking my menopausal, old body, to lose 25 lbs in 8 months.   I don't know if I can do it, but I'm certainly going to try.  Doing the math, I have to lose 3 lbs a month.  That's 0.75 lbs a week.  When you break it down like that, it sounds doable.  A couple things I didn't do well, and why it took so long last time, and why I don't do well now at all, is that I always give myself a weekend pass.  I can eat and drink whatever on the weekend, and that usually starts on Friday evening.  That has to end.  

I ate very well this last weekend, but I did eat a little more, and drank more, which caused a weekend gain of 1lb, which is better than past weekend gains, but still not great. (Past weekend gains had me gaining everything I had lost through the work week, so I was essentially starting each week at the same number.)  Friday morning I weighed 172.6, this morning I weighed 174.  Honestly, that's still a full pound in less than a week, and I "only" need to lose 0.75 in a week, but if I let that mentality in, I will not succeed.  And I need to succeed.  

So motivation, it's a big factor.  I have to stay focused, and determined.  This red clover definitely helps. I've also been running a little more. Although, I also get frustrated because I used to be "half-marathon ready" at all times, and now I'm barely "5k ready" and if I did race a 5k, it would likely be my slowest pace ever.  I just have to get over looking backwards at where I was, and look forward knowing I can get there again.  

I do not want to feel the way I did last summer.  I want to feel more like I did in 2015.

April 2023

October 2015 (marathon)

(It was very difficult to find a recent full-body picture of me.)

I think I'm going to add a page to my blog.  Maybe a progress page counting down the days to August (we don't know what day we're going on the cruise yet) and the weight I've lost.  If I quit updating, you'll know I'll have given up and I'm doing nothing.  I wish I knew how to make a counter and add it to this page, but I don't know how.

Birthday sickness

After my last post, well, even before my last post, I got sick.  The last week of September, Sunday into Monday night, I woke up and threw up, it was sooooo bad.  I don't ever remember a time when I threw up so hard and so many times.  I'd feel a little better and go lay down, but then be up 20 min, back in the bathroom.  I even slept, literally, wrapped around the toilet.  I have never been that sick, ever.  It was awful.  Thankfully the throwing up part only lasted that one night, but I felt "off" for a couple days.  Then I got a cold, runny nose, coughing, almost immediately after that.  

Monday night the 2nd of October, Chris and I were getting to watch the Seahawks on Monday night football, and he jokingly said "maybe you should take a COVID test" because I had just had a coughing fit. I thought maybe it was a good idea, so took a test, and it was positive.  Then I realized that the tests we have are expired, so I thought, well, maybe it's not COVID, so I made Chris run to the store and buy tests for everyone (they are expensive!).  And that one was also positive, no one else was positive though.  I retreated to my room.   

For my job I go to court every Tuesday (I do a therapeutic court) so I had to call them and request virtual court. (One good thing that came from the pandemic, virtual court . . . if you have a court date and are sick or can't make it, call the courthouse, the MAY be able to accomodate a virtual hearing, depends on the court).  

Anyway, I had already been kicking around the idea of going to the Lake for my birthday (which is Oct. 6, that Friday), so I decided that since I was the only one in my house with COVID and it was my birthday, I would go to the Lake by myself.

~~~I think I have not mentioned that we got a dog.  He is adorable, is a 7 month old lab mix, that we got  in August. He came from a shelter in Texas.  His name is Peanut Butter, but we call him Peanut.  

The first day we got him, he was very
droopy, tail tucked, ears down.

The first night we had him, he was 
scared of the stairs, Damian had to
carry him down.

A few weeks later.

~~~~

Anyway, Peanut and I went to the Lake.  I don't think he's been so spoiled in his life with food.  He had a lot of bacon with me, part of my steak dinner, and pretty much a little of everything I ate (I did feed him dog food). 

He is such a scaredy cat (dog), he was scared of the deer on our walks. At night he freaked me out because he'd bark at the dark sliding glass door for no reason.  I was definitely scared to go out with him to let him go to the bathroom.  I ended up just throwing him on the lead and letting him go out alone.  He's scared of he dark though, so I had to turn on all the outside lights for him to even leave the porch. 🤣

But he loved being outside, with me, during the day, even though he was scared of the ducks and even people on their porches.

The sunset in October is so different than in August.  In August it sets just over the dock in the above picture.  In October it was setting behind the hills off to the left in the picture.  But it was soooo pretty.

I spent my birthday day raking pine needles from the beach under the tree.  They were so bad!  It took me 3 hours (maybe longer) to rake all those needles.  But I enjoyed it.  My birthday was Friday, and the weather wasn't great, so I didn't do a whole lot outside other than rake.  But by Saturday, it was beautiful, and warm!  I spent a lot of the afternoon outside.  I wouldn't think that 2 months would move the sun so much, but my typical afternoon sunny spot in August, didn't ever see much sun.  I ended up sitting mostly on the other side of the tree.  I just found it so strange

Look at the difference of the beach after
I raked!

I didn't want to bring firewood so I brought a firepit that runs on alcohol (rubbing alcohol).  I had gotten it last year for my birthday and used it a few times last winter and a little this summer outside.  But it was perfect . . . after I realized I should open the flue even though I wasn't actually using the fireplace.  I set off the fire alarm more than once, with that and with cooking (nothing was burnt, it was just very sensitive).  

On my way down, my brother-in-law suggested I get myself some champagne and a cake for my birthday, so even though I brought food, I ended up stopping at the store and got a good steak, shrimp, a small lemon cream pie and some champagne (prosecco, if you're a wine snob).  I would have made mashed potatoes too, but I didn't want to peel potatoes and boxed mashed is not very good.

Honestly, even though I had to cook my own food and do my own dishes, it was probably one of the best birthdays I've ever had.  Nothing against my family but it was crazy relaxing and I thoroughly enjoyed it.  I did get bored a little during the day, the water was too cold to get in, and like I said Friday wasn't great weather-wise, but just getting away was heavenly.  I would really love to go back, but I don't know that I could get away with it.  Maddox was very jealous that I went, and Chris acted like he felt guilty he couldn't go.  I just enjoyed being alone.  😀

Peanut often hangs his head off his bed
while he's laying on it, it's weird.

Struggling

 Two years ago I woke up to a phone call from my sister who was visiting my Dad.  All she did was cry, she didn't say anything, and I knew. I denied it, tried to get her to tell me I was wrong, but I wasn't.  My Dad was gone.  He died in his sleep.  He died with my sister there taking care of him.  I'm so happy she was there, otherwise he would have died alone.

I was going to post more, but I can't, so I'm going to leave with of pictures of my Dad.

Musings

 Well, the 8 of you that read my last post sucked at telling me where you go to read the blogs you follow.  😉

So I went to my new gym 3 times but my quads hurt really bad.  After Tuesday it hurt but was okay-ish.  Damian got his son, Asher for the week on Tuesday and then had to go to the store after putting him to bed.  Well, Asher was crying so I went down to check on him and his shirt was all twisted. I don't remember why, but I was holding him and knelt down and felt a sharp pain in my thigh.  It hurt sooooo bad, I don't know what I did, maybe strained or pulled a muscle, but I could barely walk up the stairs.  I didn't go back to the gym for a few days, but Thursday night thought it was doing better so was going to go work out Friday morning.  I don't remember what I did, but I decided it would be a bad idea so canceled.  Then tripped on a shoe Saturday morning and hurt it again.  I did end up going to the gym yesterday afternoon.  I'm feeling pretty good today, other than a giant knot in my shoulder, but those are common for me, I don't even have to do anything to get them.

I did go in on Friday morning to do a body scan thing, and was pleasantly surprised.  With all my clothes on, I only weighed one pound more than I did when I got up (I wasn't allowed to eat before the scan).  I don't remember all the numbers, but I have more muscle than I expected, and according to the scan, I only have 18.5 lbs to lose (which is almost exactly what I've gained, so that is good).  My arm muscles are about even, but my left leg has about a pound more muscle than my right, but I am left leg dominant, so I need to work on using my right leg more often.

I gained 2lbs this weekend, but since I lost those 2lbs this morning, I'm thinking I was dehydrated.  I am definitely not as good at drinking water on the weekend as I am during the week at work.  This has been a theme for a long time though, maybe I should quit weighing myself on Mondays to give my body time to reabsorb water.  I feel like that might just be a cop out to make myself not accountable on the weekend.

I haven't been forthcoming with what I weigh, so it might be confusing.  I'm embarrassed by it, that I let myself gain 20lbs.  But seriously, I'm basically not losing.  I initially lost 2 lbs when I started this, and ever since then I've been losing the same 2 lbs.  Last week I was excited because on Tuesday when I weighed in (no weigh in on Monday, Labor Day) I was the same as Friday, but it was still 1lb higher, so last week I lost 1lb.  I was a lot less active though, only worked out on Monday and Tuesday, and only walked Wednesday and Sunday.  I forgot, I also did a wine walk with my sister on Saturday, but after thinking about it, they only do 1oz pours, and there were 10 tastings, so only 10oz, which is about a glass and a half of wine with a lot of walking over 3-4 hours.  

*okay, I'm going to rewrite that paragraph, but add in my weight.  This is when I'm thankful I don't have a lot of followers.*

 I haven't been forthcoming with what I weigh, so it might be confusing.  I'm embarrassed by it, that I let myself gain 20lbs my beginning weight (this time) was 166.  But seriously, I'm basically not losing.  I initially lost 2 lbs, going to 164, when I started this, and ever since then I've been losing the same 2 lbs.  Last week I was excited because on Tuesday when I weighed in (no weigh in on Monday, Labor Day) I was the same as Friday (which was 165), but it was still 1lb higher, so last week I lost 1lb, back down to 164 .  I was a lot less active though, only worked out on Monday and Tuesday, and only walked Wednesday and Sunday.  I forgot, I also did a wine walk with my sister on Saturday, but after thinking about it, they only do 1oz pours, and there were 10 tastings, so only 10oz, which is about a glass and a half of wine with a lot of walking over 3-4 hours.  So yesterday I was 166 again, and today I was 164.

Anyway, this week I plan to work out at least Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.  I am still doing yoga, and actually those are the same days I do yoga (totally unrelated, just is going to happen that way this week).  And with eating better, hopefully I'll lose some more weight and get out of the 164s.  

I don't have any pictures this week, so I'll just share Asher's birthday pictures.  He turns 4 today, but we celebrated on Sunday.  😊

Blog readers?

 Just a quick question, what do others (you) use to read blogs you follow? I was using Bloglovin', but it doesn't work anymore.  I actually lost a couple that I loved.  (If anyone knows/talks to/follows Accidental Firefly and Inside the Mountain's Skin, ask them to send me a link to follow them, I loved reading their blogs. 😁

Oh and to top it off, my favorite podcast player, Stitcher, also went away.  So I guess if you have recommendations on that, I'd love those too.  😊

Not that I have many people who read my blog, but it's worth a shot to ask.  

Yes, those are all the blogs I've read.  Most of them no longer post, and haven't for a lot of years.  It's why I keep looking for new ones, although I am waaaayyyy behind on those that I do read.  A couple of my most favorites, Shut Up and Run and Sublurban Mama are on that list (Sublurban Mama hasn't posted in . . .4? . . .5? years.)

Still progressing

 Well, I joined a gym.  I think it's similar to a CrossFit gym (having never been in one, I'm not sure), but it only offers group workouts, there are no "regular" exercise machines, and no weight machines.  I did a trial workout on Saturday and man am I sore!!!  But then I decided to do it, and signed up yesterday (Monday) and did another workout.  And, I'm still sore.  The gym is called Fit Body Boot Camp, and it's new in my area, so they are giving a lower fee to get members, and that fee is mine as long as I don't leave.  It's still rather expensive, but I need something to kick me into gear, maybe this will.

One of the thoughts I had was that my sister spent $3000 on 30/10 for 3 months.  Which I know is a nutritional/diet program (it's also a starvation program).  I figured maybe doing this at $35 a week (yes, you read that right) for 3 months is cheaper than 30/10 and I won't starve, and may get fitter.  (Is fitter a word?  spell check is not underlining it . . .) And in the process, maybe lose some fat.

I think another of the reasons why I joined this gym is because of the guided classes.  There's no working out on my own, and because they're so new, the classes are very small, so it's a lot of one-on-one coaching during the class.  I really enjoyed my trial workout, even though my legs are still sore from it (yesterday's class was a lot easier, so it may have "helped" my soreness, but I think it's still mostly from Saturday).

So how did I do with my weight this weekend?  

The last 2 weekends were awful, 2 weeks ago I went up 4 lbs, last weekend I went up 5lbs.  Both weeks, I got back down to the previous Friday's weight before the end of the week, and this weekend I decided I needed to do better.  Honestly, I didn't think I did much better but I did not gain any weight over the holiday weekend.  This morning I weighed in at exactly the same amount as I did on Friday morning.  !!  I think that's great! 3 day weekend, and I went to a birthday party on Sunday.  😀

I am not drinking nearly as much as I was.  The trick for me is to not have wine in the house.  I can resist if it's not there and honestly last week I didn't really even miss it.  I do buy a couple bottles for the weekend, but am *trying* to keep it in moderation.  I actually really wanted a glass or two last night, but only had my "special" wine, expensive wine that I've gotten over the years with my sister when we do a wine walk, and I'm unwilling to open that wine.  However, I almost did last night, but went for a walk instead.  

In other news, Maddox started Jr. High last week.  I seriously can't believe he's so old!  Jr. High where we currently live starts at 7th grade.  In Mount Vernon, they changed it to "middle school" and he was supposed to start last year in 6th grade, but we moved.  Also, I think he looks so old in this picture!  I really can't believe he's 12 and in 7th grade!

Anyway, that's all for today!

progress not perfection

 So how did my first week back at truly working on my weight go?  Well, last week I killed it, I lost 2 lbs.  I am intermittent fasting (IF) from about 6pm-9am . . . sometimes it's closer to 7pm-10pm, depending on dinner.  After dinner, every week night, I am walking, I have a route that's roughly 2.5 miles, but am not really going based on distance, more like time.  

Pre-stopping everything, I talked a little about menopause and beachyogagirl, who did a series of posts on it and how she lost 20lbs after gaining 20lbs due to menopause.  One of the things she suggests is walking, something that gets the heart rate up, but not too high.  She talks about "zone 2," I interpret that on my heartrate monitor to be "easy" which is just under "aerobic."  She says in her blog 20 min of that every day after dinner to help digest food, so you're not going to bed still digesting.  My 2.5 mile walk is 35 min, but I figure that gives me time to get my heart rate up to where it should be.  This week I added some running spurts to keep it up, but they are not long, just long enough to get my heart rate back up.  According to. . . something . . . my "easy" rate is between 109 and 122.  I think I did a bunch of googling last week to figure out what easy was for me.

Not every day, but most days, I spend a little time in our "weight room" in the garage after my walk.  My weights aren't heavy, but they say muscle burns more calories than fat, so I figure building muscle is good.  I am also still doing pilates/yoga with my sister 4 mornings a week.  I don't see that stopping.  I do want to start running again, but for now, this is what I'm doing.

Well, until Friday.  Friday and Saturday I did nothing, especially Friday.  And I drank a lot on Friday, I don't know why, I didn't intend to, but you know, once you get to a certain level, your drunk brain says kee going.  I wasn't as bad on Saturday, but did drink, and no activity other than yard work.  Sunday I was lazy again, but kept myself to 2 drinks.  And yesterday I had gained 4 lbs.  I don't know how you can gain 4lbs in 3 days, but I did.  I also didn't weigh myself at all Saturday and Sunday, and didn't do IF Friday night through Sunday morning.  I started my IF Sunday night and was good yesterday and was down 2lbs (still up 2 from Friday, but back to "starting weight").

I know weekends are my problem, they always have been.  When I was running 10+ miles on Sunday it wasn't as big of a deal, but now it is, so I need to do better.  However, Thursday we are going to the Lake for a long weekend, so I don't think my weigh in next Tuesday (we get back Monday) will be good.  I plan to continue to walk there, but there are no good routes that will take me 30 min, other than on the road I hate, that I used to run on.  

So, next week, when we get back, I am going to really push myself to be good, and I may start running again.  If I don't start running, I may have to change my blog title.  😉 I am going to try to be good at the Lake, but . . . it's hard on vacation.  

Aloha!

 As I was clicking on Blogger, I thought, I don't think I've posted since May.  Then, really, May?  Then the screen loaded and yep, May 18th was my last post.  

I haven't posted because I'm not doing anything.  Or I haven't been. 

So I completely quit intermittent fasting, at first it was because of Maddox's baseball games, they were going until 8pm or so and I just couldn't not eat at all, and then to wait 15-16 hours, that would put me at noon before eating, and that's just too late for me.  However, when baseball was over, I didn't restart.

I did very good with running 3 days a week for April and May, but then in June and July missed a couple weeks, and August has been . . . well, I haven't run at all in August.  I take that back, I ran on August 1st.  

My weight . . . well, let's not talk about that at all.

We went to Hawaii at the end of July for 2 weeks, in fact, today is only my second day back at work.  We stayed in Kauai, so were not impacted by the fire in Maui at all.  I love running in Hawaii, it is my most favorite place to run, and I only ran once there.  I didn't even get to the place that I love the most during my run.  In the past, when I run there, I run 4 miles because it gets me to an overlook that I like, but I haven't been running much, and with the humidity there and the warmth, I barely made 3 miles.  I had plans to drive down a little ways so I could run on the trail that's the really pretty area, but I never did.  We did a lot of activities and I scheduled them all in the morning so that we could go to the beach afterwards, but it made it difficult to run in the morning when it's marginally cooler.  

While in Hawaii I noticed . . . well, that's not accurate, because I noticed it a lot earlier than that, but I really thought about it . . . that I am super unhappy with my weight.  I didn't buy a dress there (I love the dresses), I didn't even want to buy a shirt because I was afraid I'd have to get a large.  It's been a long time since I bought large.  

Then on the last Monday Damian and I went for a hike and he talked a lot about getting into shape.  He's lost quite a bit of weight since we moved, and came to the realization that he's pretty scrawny (his words not mine).  He's been watching some YouTube shorts about motivation and getting into shape, so he has really decided that he's going to work out to "buff" up.  

Before Hawaii I had decided I was going to cut back on alcohol and eat better when we got home. I just feel like a whale and being in Hawaii really reinforced that feeling.  

This last Sunday I started (I know, I gave myself 2 days at home before cracking down).  We got a weight machine many years ago from a friend, that we've never really used, and then he moved and took the weights with him (he did say the weights were a loan). Six months ago, or so I bought a few weights, just a couple 5 lbs and 2 ten lbs weights for the machine, I think total 40 lbs, but we accidentally ended up with two 5 lb weights from our friend, so we have a total of 50 lbs.  I told Damian I wasn't buying more if the machine wasn't used (weights are expensive!!) so I haven't gotten anymore.  

Well, Damian said in Hawaii that he'd like to get the machine out so it's usable in the garage, and start working out.  We did that on Sunday, redid one side of our garage, moved my treadmill over to that side, and now have a mini-gym in our garage.  Damian has big plans, and honestly I'd like to make it bigger too, with a spin bike and more free weights, but not until I know it's going to be used often.  

I've worked out on it both yesterday and Sunday, plus I started walking every evening after dinner, oh and I restarted intermittent fasting.  And the big one, I quit drinking every day.  I am not giving up alcohol, especially wine, I'm just cutting way back.  And I started weighing every day again, which I haven't done for several years.

I plan on walking after dinner every day   most days, and I'm going to keep up with the intermittent fasting and less alcohol.  

We'll see how it works out.  

here's a few of the many pictures I took in Hawaii . . .

If you ever go to Kauai, Jo Jo's Shave
Ice is the best.

You also must go to Poipu beach to see the sunset 
and watch the turtles come to shore.

Sunrise is my favorite there.  Because they are 3
hours behind, waking up to see it is very easy.  

Latest ramblings

 So, I succeeded in my April goal of running at least 3 miles 3 days a week.  Then something happened last week and I only ran twice.  I had been kicking around the idea of adding a long run on Sundays in May, but then didn't.  Then last week I realized I hadn't run again on Friday and knew that if I didn't I wouldn't get my 3 days in, but it was sorta late, and I didn't want to, so I didn't.  However, I had a great run on Sunday, but it wasn't a long run. 

So far I've only run once this week, which was on Sunday.  I've had a conference this week, it's virtual, but it's also live, I'm virtual in Washington, and the live part is going on in Boston.  It starts at 8am in Boston, which is 5am here. So I've had some early mornings and am tired.  I haven't been running, I thought I'd run during the lunch break, but I've been sleeping instead because their lunch break is at 9am.  And it's been quite warm here, so I'm not wanting to run when it's so "hot."

It's so ridiculous because I thought once it warmed up and wasn't rainy all the time I'd want to go run more, but now it's warm and I don't want to run in the heat.  I think it's because we went from 45-55 degrees to 70-80 degrees within a week.  We completely skipped spring, although, I think it's going to the 60's next week for at least a few days.  

Last week I did really, really well with my food.  I actually haven't been tracking it, but I've been eating good.  I lost 2 lbs last week.  I was ecstatic, but am not hopeful for a loss this week.  I am eating okay, yesterday I had chips for lunch though, so definitely not as good as last week.  

I have not been doing the intermittent fasting for a while now. My son started baseball and his games start at 6 and often end at 8 or later, so I am not eating until I get home afterwards.  I can't go until 12p or 1p to eat the next day, I'm too hungry.  I have tried to keep my morning schedule of starting to eat between 10 and 11, but, like I said, it's still not true IF.  It actually has gotten a lot easier to wait . . .  Well, until this week.  I am waking up at 4:30am to get online for my conference.  I am so tired that I've started drinking coffee with milk and creamer.  

I weigh myself tomorrow . . . I should have waited to post this until then, but I'm quite worried I gained again because that is typically what I have been doing lately.  I can't seem to stay under 160 lately (last week I was 158).  

This is from my run on Sunday.  I ran fairly early because Sunday was the hottest day here (86 degrees) and I didn't want to run when it was so hot. (I really admire those people that run in the true heat, Arizona, Nevada, California, eastern Washington, everywhere but here.)