Losing a loved one has a sobering affect on you. It definitely makes you care less about some things. There are things that just aren't very important to me right now, and for the month of April that was running. Although, I did intentionally take the month off, I didn't have that urge to go for a run. Not really at all. When my sister and I walked Bloomsday a few weeks ago, I felt that urge a couple times, but it's still not the pressing need it once was.
I started running after Bloomsday and my foot is doing great. I am rolling and icing it regularly, almost daily, and the miles I've done so far (13) has not been hard on it. I do need to start running more if I am going to do a marathon in October. My training needs to start in June for that.
My schedule has been pretty hectic. I have school now, so I'm working on that, and Maddox is in Little League, and of course his games are on Tuesday and Thursday, the two days of the work week that I run.
At the end of April I decided to switch gyms. I switched from the LA Fitness near my work to one in Mount Vernon because it was easier to go to after work. I went several times in April and haven't been back since I started running again. I'm afraid I'm going to have started paying for a gym that I'm never going to use, and this particular gym is a year contract or I have to pay a fee to cancel. (LA Fitness didn't have a year contract.) I was doing online spin classes when I was going, and I really enjoyed it, but trying to figure out what days their group room was open when I was home was rather annoying.
My dad came over last weekend to watch Maddox play baseball, and for Mother's Day. It was a really nice visit with him and it really helped me keep my mind off my Mom. I am still in denial that she's gone. It really just doesn't seem real. The other day I had a moment of pure anger, not at her, but at the world. Why her? She was so full of life. Why now?
And I get angry when I hear other people's stories of their parents death. I always feel that it isn't the same. A security guard at the courthouse was telling me his mom passed away "sometime in February or March." He was telling me this less than a month after my mom passed away (also about a month for him too) and he couldn't even remember when it was. And then he was saying she was in her 90's, she was struggling for a long time, and I couldn't help but think . . . it's not the same. You expected your mom to die. 90 is a great age to die . . .my mom was 70, and a very young 70, and she died very suddenly.
Back to life.
On top of my dad being her this last weekend, I bought a car. I'm super excited about it. We've needed a second car for years, and this year I was going to make it happen no matter what. At first I was planning on getting an older car that I could just buy outright, but the more I looked, the more I realized that the price I could pay outright would not get me what I wanted. I found many cars that would have worked, but I really wanted a newer car with few miles that I won't be afraid is going to die on me.
I ended up getting a 2016 Hyundai Elantra GT, and I love it. It's much newer than I was thinking I would get, but I'm super happy with it.
Here are pictures from Bloomsday and the last few weeks.
My new car! =)
Finally a sunny run!!
Maddox running to first at his baseball game last night